Here is the unedited text of one game. Be warned that in it's raw form, it's not as interesting as the finished, polished project. Many people don't realize that every word they say or type isn't all that funny or deserving of enshrinement. This does, however, allow a view into what goes on during those commercial breaks.

Elroy-L> night breed, huh?  sounds like a winner...
*** Glamdring (Glamdring@208.138.65.41) has joined #MST-HomeGame
*** Glamdring (Glamdring@208.138.65.41) has left #MST-HomeGame
Elroy-L> i hope this is a 'super' movie...
*** BEMaven (christopher@66-144.pop.fh.gle.verio.com) has joined #MST-HomeGame
Elroy-L> oh no, joe roth
Djenk> lo BEMaven
Djenk> Iron: all is well now...
BEMaven> lo, folks.
Elroy-L> hugh "devil man" ross
BEMaven> i just saw the Wicker demon
Djenk> Greatful Dead: The early years
Elroy-L> b.s.c = bronze swimming certificate
BEMaven> cave painting by numbers
Djenk> Cave Paintings of Sure Commericals
BEMaven> raimi's shaky cam strikes again.
Elroy-L> where the director of photography during this part?
Ironf> When bad prostetic effects attack
Djenk> When Costume Parties Go Bad
BEMaven> Spencer's Gift Asylum
Elroy-L> the erotic exotic ball
Elroy-L> hes a witty guy...
Djenk> These were the images he conjures up during sex....lovely
*** Plumm (uu@PRSYB206-37.splitrock.net) has joined #MST-HomeGame
Djenk> lo Plumm
BEMaven> yes, get out of Calgary...where trick or treat runs all year
Plumm> is der movie on?
Elroy-L> yes
BEMaven> why could that guy dream of Victoria's Secret?
BEMaven> couldn't
Elroy-L> and that was?
Djenk> That was quick....
Djenk> ...and pointless
Elroy-L> its X-eyes
BEMaven> a four foot wide freezer?  hmmm,
Ironf> good thing they don't cut much on TBS
*** Glamdring (Glamdring@208.138.65.41) has joined #MST-HomeGame
BEMaven> wait, show the psycho again.  We might win a Monstervision T-Shirt.
*** Glamdring (Glamdring@208.138.65.41) has left #MST-HomeGame
Ironf> Sign one your film may be in trouble: You invite other directors to play one of your leads
Elroy-L> just dreams? i think not. tell me about your mother.
Elroy-L> sign two, focus on a stack of balls.
BEMaven> Doc:  I like fruit.  You like fruit.
Djenk> Jello Molds.....Handi Wipes...\
Elroy-L> Dr. P. Decker ??
Elroy-L> Prozac: the early years
Ironf> It's a KILLER
BEMaven> uh, you don't take the whole bottle at once, guy.
Ironf> He must be busy out coding up Mortal Kombat
Elroy-L> oops, he gave him the LSD
BEMaven> well, better check with Walgrens about side effects.
Elroy-L> "When cracks addicts KILL!"
Ironf> To get good reviews, they slipped the same drug in the soda of the test audience
Djenk> Don't you hate it when you mix up the acid with the anti-psychotics?
BEMaven> oh, yeah.  swallowing lithium all at once is VERY healthy.
Ironf> "SHUT-UP!"
Djenk> Isn't that the roadie from the CDNOW.com commercials?
BEMaven> is that geek another horror director doing a cameo?
Elroy-L> Meat Loaf?
Ironf> I don't think so BEM
BEMaven> that are very scary guitar picks he uses.
Ironf> He does look a little Carpenter-esque, but is WAY too doughy
Elroy-L> so....he's satan?
Ironf> Fun Fact: Meridian is the title of a Full Moon Video movie about Werewolves
Djenk> More like Phil, the prince of insufficient light\
BEMaven> 'i know something i won't tell....Injun Joe is ticklish.'
BEMaven> 'you.....you.....you're the one who directed 'Crash', you bastard!'
Ironf> I can tell by the way he talks, the way he walks, that he's a ladies man
Djenk> no time to talk
Elroy-L> ah,ah,ah,ah....
BEMaven> i suddenly long for the crisp narrative of 'Jacobs Ladder'
Ironf> NOT a matte painting
Djenk> Time has no meaning here......literally...night to late afternoon and back again
BEMaven> he's wandered into the garage sale of 'Legend'
Elroy-L> ah, grave sweet grave.....
Elroy-L> yo quero taco bell
BEMaven> ...or a Jim Henson rummage sale.
Ironf> And the magical Bong lights up
Djenk> Yo Quiero Nightbreed?
Elroy-L> naked boy?
BEMaven> the cemetary caretaker is from Maui?
Elroy-L> hey, watch it with that forehead, pokey.
Ironf> You can love your dog, just don't 'love' your dog
Ironf> So after he was fired from all those McDonald's commercials, looks like Moon Man had to start mugging folks
BEMaven> "i can smell innocense at 50 yards"
*** Wonderbug (jylo_75@206.151.91.160) has joined #MST-HomeGame
*** Wonderbug (jylo_75@206.151.91.160) has left #MST-HomeGame
Djenk> I f** the law, and the law won
Djenk> f***
Ironf> and now, bongo time
Elroy-L> it's mac the knife!
BEMaven> did Chester Gould draw that hatchet face demon?
Ironf> Please say that's not Chrisopher Lloyd?
Djenk> Its not....
Elroy-L> hmmm......ok.....
Ironf> (nelson) HAHA (/nelson)
Djenk> You know, he just may not have had a gun...
BEMaven> "he's got a gun"....what happened to doctor/patient confidentiallly?
Elroy-L> this movie hurts already....
*** Plumm has quit IRC ((signed off))
BEMaven> we are more than 10 minutes into this,  and all i can make out is the hero has some body odor issues.
Ironf> Ahhh John Agar makes a special appearence in this
Djenk> So, what do we have so far......a confused, acid-dropping, recently deceased  misfit with connections to the afterlife....a shrink  with a seriously twisted bedside manner.....
* Djenk regards this a mere pallete warmer for Mazes&Monsters later......
Ironf> I highly doubt that game will be getting off the ground cause it's so late
BEMaven> you know, Clive Barker felt people didn't really understand this film
Djenk> Clive confused "not understanding" with "deep loathing"
BEMaven> how can she be sure it's her boyfriend if she doesn't look in his pants?
BEMaven> "mIss Winston...everyone has a secret face."
Ironf> Thank you Ben Stien
Ironf> Stein
Djenk> That was rude...
BEMaven> somebody help me...I'm seeing director guest-appearances every where.
Ironf> I just trying to catch John Agar
BEMaven> ahh, the cheerful banter of the local barkeep.
Ironf> Whores: Hearts-o-gold since 1802
BEMaven> "do you want a drink...i want a drink."
* Djenk hands IronF the John Agar jar(holes in lid prepunched) :)
BEMaven> Thelma and Louise -- The zombie Years.
Ironf> They have GOT to be pissed that he is the only normal looking one
Djenk> Why is he wearing a VW logo around his neck?
Ironf> I'm betting Agar was the boss guy
*** Glamdring (Glamdring@208.138.65.41) has joined #MST-HomeGame
*** Glamdring (Glamdring@208.138.65.41) has left #MST-HomeGame
BEMaven> god, it's the green room for Jerry Springer's show.
Djenk> Plese don't smoke, we're dead
BEMaven> "aaron Boon...the tribes of Moon embrace you."
Ironf> nope, not over the top at all
Djenk> So...he's certifiable as well...
Elroy-L> no, it's a graveyard honey....
BEMaven> 'wanna give the canyon jump another try, sugar?'
Ironf> and now some bad country
Elroy-L> look out! she's got a gun!
Elroy-L> this can't be a movie. 
Djenk> What is it then?
Ironf> anyone else have really low sound during the movie, then regular sound during commercials?
Elroy-L> trash?
Elroy-L> something to put in between the commercials?
Djenk> Iron: Yes
Elroy-L> Iron:Yes
Elroy-L> typical TBS
BEMaven> yes, but do you have a deodorant that makes me smell innocent?
Elroy-L> recap: so the head shrinker kills the guy who everyone thinks is the killer, but isn't because he's meat for the moonheads?
* Djenk wonders who at Pitney Bowes thought Cliff Claven was the perfect celebrety spokesman is beyond me
BEMaven> worse still, IronF...the close captions are twice as big for the commercials.
Djenk> Elroy: Yep, and 3:2 the shrink is the killer
Djenk> actually, more like 2:2.....
Elroy-L> if the head shrinker is the killer, then what's with the moonheads?
Elroy-L> this movie disturbs me.
BEMaven> i'm guessing the killer turns out to be James Cameron.
Elroy-L> no, please don't return....
Elroy-L> damn
Djenk> put your hand in the air....and wave...never mind
Elroy-L> the fly?
Elroy-L> help me!
BEMaven> "bling her?"
BEMaven> I. M> Weasel?
Elroy-L> Gremlins 6 --the stupidest ending yet
Elroy-L> pay no attention to the man behind....
Ironf> That's one ugly ass cat
Ironf> See the shrink is the killer and he uses the tapes of his patients to give him the ideas for killing, thus he can easily pin it on them
Elroy-L> ok, but what about the moonheads?
Elroy-L> jungle boy
Ironf> They are "boogie-men" for lack of a better word. Mutant race that live seperated from society
BEMaven> "the child has no life to save."
Elroy-L> and their roll in this movie, besides filler, is?
Djenk> A plot device....
Ironf> filler, talk soup filler, Abrams, Adams, Agar
Elroy-L> hey, don't play with your food.
BEMaven> more filler, Elroy...to keep Cronenberg from acting.
Ironf> "Y'all come back now, ya hear"
Elroy-L> oh, so he's "acting" now, is he?
Elroy-L> if it doesn't get all over the place....
Ironf> There is no acting, he's actually that damn creepy
Elroy-L> what a shock.
Ironf> wait till he brings out the rednecks, then it's a party
BEMaven> a ford Fairmont wagon...the true mark of horror.
Ironf> Oh and the reason he kills is cause he wants into Midean too
Ironf> "BOOOOOOONNNNNNNN"
Elroy-L> and he put the mask back on because???
Ironf> retarded
Elroy-L> oh, so he could take it off....
Elroy-L> so, he gets the special power of being ugly?
Ironf> and second-hand smoke
Elroy-L> wow, they have a lot of laws.
Ironf> AGAR
Elroy-L> devo!
BEMaven> John Agar....happy, IronF?
Ironf> yup
Djenk> "Dead folk"
Elroy-L> nope, them dead folk sure can't hide well.
BEMaven> so after, what...50 years?...Agar can finally act?
Ironf> walleye are biting
Elroy-L> again with the mask.  we all know who it is.
Ironf> I think this was Agar's last film
Djenk> I loved My Gay Dead Stuffed Dog
Elroy-L> Iron: thats seems to be a good thing.
BEMaven> he died?  I didn't know.
*** shae (shae@hut139.ourtownusa.net) has joined #MST-HomeGame
*** shae has quit IRC ((signed off))
Ironf> I thought he did, but according to IMDB he hasn't
Elroy-L> this movie lacks something.....
Djenk> compelling characters?
BEMaven> more like a thousand somethings, Elroy.
Ironf> He was in John Carpenter's Body Bags in 93, and a video game in 96, and that's most current
BEMaven> this movie needs Quentin Tarritino as a hooker with a heart of gold.
Elroy-L> "can we talk about Mitchel?"
Elroy-L> this movie needs a sequel 
BEMaven> ...and Alfred Hitchcock as the love interest.
Ironf> Ohhhhh YEAHHHH!
Elroy-L> did you sleep well?
BEMaven> "baboon is dead"?
Elroy-L> thats a stupid power, she can show people what they already know.
BEMaven> It also needs Spielburg as the virgin babysitter.
Ironf> so fly your freak flag high then or something
Elroy-L> no, he's just a little off
BEMaven> she shrivels at the sight of bad spfx.
Elroy-L> oh yes, another stupid law
Elroy-L> hey! don't poke me
Elroy-L> again with the mask!
Ironf> get off my damn lawn!
Elroy-L> well, he's done up right pretty with them lights and all.
Ironf> "I was born to destroy them"
Elroy-L> so, he wears the mask so he can be known as "Button Eyes"?
BEMaven> Mr. Potato Head IS death!
Elroy-L> meanwhile, in the catacombs....
Ironf> Where did he come from, where did he go? Where didja ya come from Button Eye Joe
Ironf> Just when you though it was goofy enough
Elroy-L> jabba!
Djenk> damn, shes nosy....
*** GersonK (GersonMK@167-47-247.ipt.aol.com) has joined #mst-homegame
Ironf> It's exactly this reason that Blue Devil was kicked outta the JLA
Elroy-L> oh, thats original
GersonK> Just another Saturday at the Mariner's Inn
BEMaven> a cemetary with it's own fun house?
Elroy-L> hey baby, can i buy you a drink?
Elroy-L> aliens?
BEMaven> The Goddess HandJiva?
GersonK> Bargain basement Munch.
Ironf> THESE PIPES ARE CLEAN!
GersonK> "Shangri-La on dope. we love it"
BEMaven> so, essentially, she's  dropped in to meet Boon's folks?
Elroy-L> so her lines are: "where's boone?"
GersonK> Don't llok into the light, Marian!
Ironf> good advice for us all "Don't look!"
Elroy-L> so he got out of the kitchen, er, hell?
BEMaven> 'don't look at it...the spfx aren't finished.'
BEMaven> 'snookums doesn't want to be undead, does snookums?'
Elroy-L> if i may quote: "This movie is painfull"
GersonK> So, a new Sega genesis for $30 - a worthwhile purchase?
Ironf> not too bad, of course that's if you can readily find games for it
BEMaven> difficult to answer, GK.  I keep losing every vid game I play.
Ironf> BTW, Have I mentioned how HOT it is here?
Ironf> especially for December
GersonK> Hmm, thinking of picking one up as a gift - not sure how good game availability is.
Ironf> It's something to think about
BEMaven> do you suppose there's a 'Nightbreed' vidgame?
Ironf> but of course, I helped code it
Ironf> I'm a big fan
*** Plumm (uu@PRSYB206-41.splitrock.net) has joined #MST-HomeGame
BEMaven> bet it has only two buttons...CONFUSE and STAY CONFUSED.
Plumm> so recap me
Plumm> Sweet Sweetgrass Inn?
Ironf> Amazing how a film can make no sense when you edit it badly
BEMaven> there's a race of shape shifters whose sole purpose is to pad out films, plumm
Djenk> Plumm: We have one live psycho shrink who wants to kill dead people....and one formerly dead guy who ran away with his still living girlfriend
*** GersonK has quit IRC ((signed off))
Ironf> Jamie, you missed john Agar
BEMaven> yes, Clive Barker has introduced a cunning plot twist:  A psychiatrist who is secretly a crazed killer.
Plumm> damn
BEMaven> more importantly...you missed Agar disguised as a xmas tree.
Plumm> It's the PSYCHOLOGIST CONSPIRACY I learned about at my prozacnon meetings.
Plumm> BRAZILISH
Plumm> Goddam stigmata, jeez I hate it when i get that stuff.
Ironf> Cronenburg wrapped him with Christmas lights, then shoved a big knife in him
BEMaven> Bernie Kopell is the Gestapo?
BEMaven> Mr. Bean as a deputy?
Djenk> Can you hear me runnin....
Ironf> Seems they want to nip it in the bud
BEMaven> yes, call for some back-up...plot
Plumm> He's a crispy one.
Plumm> Oh, it's like the Sistine Chapel there
Plumm> Them's some charred Gaines-burgers.
BEMaven> whoops. airbags filled with hydrogen was not a good idea.
Ironf> Who would have guessed. Illinois Nazis
Plumm> When did this turn into a Jack Van Impe video?
Djenk> Ah, heres a good idea.....rednecks, weapons, gasoline
Elroy-L> and trucks!
BEMaven> yes, the Gun and knife show will save us.
Plumm> Paul Reubnes?
Plumm> ens
Elroy-L> ah, the power of smoke....
Ironf> Joe Camel strikes back
Plumm> Hicky fire.
Elroy-L> SLEEP!
BEMaven> ohh... did we mention that these Nightbreeds have super strength?
Plumm> I don't really want to make him cry.
Elroy-L> take me, sub-creature...
Plumm> On a very special Growing Pains, Carol's drunk driving victim unfriend boyfriend feeds her too much corpse and poor Carol goes bulimic.
BEMaven> I never thought I'd say it...but I miss Filbo from 'Meteorites'
Plumm> Next, on ABC.
Plumm> On a very special Growing Pains, Carol's drunk driving victim undead boyfriend feeds her too much corpse and poor Carol goes bulimic.
Plumm> important revision there
Plumm> George Michael admits losing dignity with toilet arrest
Plumm> LONDON, Dec 4 (AFP) - British singer George Michael has admitted losing his dignity with his arrest in Los Angeles for indecency in a men's public toilet, but claimed he has managed to hold on to his popularity.
Plumm> In a television interview to be broadcast on Saturday, 35-year-old Michael said: "I've had a really tough decade. I've lost a partner. I've lost my mother. I've lost my dignity.
Ironf> yes, unfriend doesn't make a whole lotta sense
Plumm> Describing his detention, he said: "There was no-one in the vicinity, but two undercover cops and a slightly randy pop star. I was not subjecting the public to full frontal nudity."
Plumm> Asked why he took such a risk, Michael answered: "Ultimately you don't see it as a massive risk if there is no-one else around, and if there's someone standing there waving their genitals around in front of you, you don't think they're an officer of law.
Plumm> "It's not your first presumption. I fell for the trick. It was very well done."
BEMaven> George needs to polish those lyrics, Plumm.
Ironf> So plumm, place any good ads today?
BEMaven> well, I can recommend a good psychiatrist for George Michael.
Elroy-L> lost sheep to shepard, you got your ears on?
Ironf> neeee-hah!
Djenk> Army Against The Dead
*** Plumm has quit IRC ((signed off))
* Djenk prays for Bruce Campbell to storm in and kick everyones ass
BEMaven> ...or at least zombies who tap dance.
BEMaven> 'i love the smell of NightBreed in the morning.'
Ironf> It's hard to kill a good 'ole boy
Elroy-L> if i say its safe to surf this catacomb, captain, its safe...
Ironf> Heartburn gotcha down?
Ironf> Al Jolsen!
BEMaven> whoa. for a moment, I thought I saw a character worth caring about.
Elroy-L> be verwy verwy quite, i'm hunting zombies.
Ironf> ohh a Shatner dropkick!
BEMaven> did he say 'spiderman'?
Elroy-L> they drew first blood!
Ironf> comedy, it's not just for normal folk anymore
Elroy-L> i am the key master
*** Plumm (uu@PRSYB111-23.splitrock.net) has joined #MST-HomeGame
BEMaven> oh, yes. everyone talks like a blues musician doing scat.
Plumm> re re re yo yo yo
Plumm> this is a wild movie.
Plumm> Cronnenburg, yes?
Ironf> yup
Ironf> He's the one that killed Agar
Djenk> indeed
Plumm> so, anyway, I went in Manhattan to hear the conspiracy protest rock band Pokerface.
Plumm> Geraldo star Ann Coulter was hanging.
Plumm> She wants to get an "Impeach Fuckface" campaign going -- bumper stickers, etc.
BEMaven> BTW, I have the Cliff Notes for 'Nightbreed'.  All ten volumes.
Plumm> that's what Monica called Bill on one of the unredacted tapes.
BEMaven> That's how he signs his vetos, Plumm
Elroy-L> i wish this movie was in 3-D...
Djenk> Elroy: It is....Dumb, Disturbing, and Dull
BEMaven> well, 3D certainly would help clear up this garbled plot.
Djenk> Ladies and Gentlemen, Your 98 Medina Monsters!!!
Elroy-L> wait, you mean theres a plot??!!!??
BEMaven> If that's the football team, God help us at Half Time.
Ironf> I have lost any and all interest in this 'film'
Elroy-L> well, that does it, this movie is so bad, i'm gonna end it all, goodbye cruel movie!
*** Elroy-L has quit IRC ((signed off))
Ironf> plop
* Djenk switches over to Sci-Fi
Plumm> What card did my sucking chest wound pick?  Guess!
BEMaven> Clive Barker: 'don't understand my story, huh?  well, what if i just blow everything up?'
Ironf> big ba-da-boom
Ironf> enjoy this fine setup for a sequel
BEMaven> clive Barker: 'don't understand my story?  too bad, i'm planning three triologies.  haaahaaahaaa!'
Ironf> there is no way anyone could have learned anything
BEMaven> Only the credits are comphrensible...and they rolled by too fast.
Plumm> oh wow, that was barker and cronnenburg
Ironf> and Agar
Plumm> so, it was a movie and now it's over.