Mystery Usenet Theater 3000

The files below are in their original, glorious, plain text format.

The Awaker Philosophy
Someone’s been watching too much Babylon 5 and thinking about life, spewing pointers to it all over Usenet, and MUT3K is there!

A Fear Of Love A Fear Of Battle (With Short: Cyberslayer):
Joss Whedon’s Buffy: The Vampire Slayer: The Series is not immune from the fanfic bug. Here’s two reasons it should be.

Brothers of Shotokan:
Street Fighter fanfic, with a short, Stop the Sad Nostalgists, about how only new videogames are good.

Deja News Changes
Like the new Deja News? Me neither. So when they sent me this e-mail announcing their new fantastic changes, I gave it the treatment. It’s a short one, tossed off in about an hour, so don’t expect a masterpiece.

Expanding Negaverse
Completed after months of hard labor over a keyboard, Expanding Negaverse is many things. It’s my unofficial official sequel to GIST Spams, it’s my second ever MST3K/Cartoon Planet crossover MSTing, it’s really not that bad a story compared to what I usually deal with, and I think it’s one of the best things I’ve done yet. Enjoy!

MSTing awarded a Golden Hamdinger for "Best New Char. in MST3K Setting" (1998) at Web Site Number 9
Fanfic awarded an Iridium Ramchip for "Best of the Worst Character" (1998) at Web Site Number 9

GIST Spams:
My now not really infamous at all MST3K/Cartoon Planet Crossover MSTing. Mentioned as one of Brak’s Top 17 Favorite Web Sites by yall.com, a dubious honor, since they obviously did a web search on "Brak" and listed the top 17 hits, but still. The actual post is a couple of insane rants with a number of Devo refs that, frankly, I completely missed.

MSTing nominated for a Golden Hamdinger for "Best Host Segments" (1997) at Web Site Number 9
MSTing nominated for a Golden Hamdinger for "Best Non-Standard MST3K MSTing" (1997) at Web Site # 9
Original nominated for a Balsa Waffle for "Worst Fanfic" (1997) at Web Site Number 9

MSTed: Video Night at Mako-Chan’s:
Not all MSTings are good. All of mine are, of course, but some MSTings are average, and some are bad, and some are very, very bad, and then there’s Dr. Thinker’s MSTing of "Video Night at Mako-Chan’s". Which is worse. Can someone successfully MST a MSTing? I’ve tried.

MSTing nominated for a Golden Hamdinger for "Best Overall Solo MSTing" (1998) at Web Site Number 9
MSTing nominated for a Golden Hamdinger for "Best Riffings" (1998) at Web Site Number 9

PC/Console Flame War
Uncovered after years of painstaking archaeological research, my real, true, Very First MSTing Ever has finally come to light. THRILL to a couple of good gags! BE ASTONISHED at my humble roots! GASP at my attempts to keep multiple levels of quoting straight! It ain’t great, but it’s of minor historical interest.

NEW: Return To Glory
Now that "Expanding Negaverse" is done, I can devote all my free time to the next goal: my very own crack at a Marrissa Story. The Trek fanfiction of Stephen Ratliff is, in many ways, better than much of the stuff I’ve done before. It certainly is better than the Doc and Awaker. But it’s still Marrissa Amber Flores Picard, it’s still Kids Crew, and there’s still that pain there. But Stephen is, as always, a gracious and nice guy.

Two Short Spams Not By Glenn Gould:
Just a couple of stinky spams, including a Clinton dope joke T-Shirt ad that has to be read to be believed, and a particularly obtuse pyramid scheme advert.

Yull Brown’s Gas:
The world’s energy problems are solved! Really! These guys aren’t raving nutters at all.

MSTing nominated for a Golden Hamdinger for "Best Riffing" (1995-1996) at Web Site Number 9
Original nominated for a Balsa Waffle for "Worst Non-Fiction" (1995-1996) at Web Site Number 9